[personal profile] drscott
So I've been assembling IKEA kitchen cabinets in the garage for installation in the laundry room. Here are the sum total of the English instructions:

The assembly should be carried out by a qualified person, due to the fact that wrong assembly can lead to that the furniture/object topples or falls resulting in personal injury or damage.


The rest of the instructions are cartoons, often obscure. I can't believe normal people can understand these. It's almost easier to look at the parts and put them together by trial and error. Assembly wasn't hard, once I realized the two mistakes in the pictographs. And the parts are really well made, so the usual problem of aseemble-it-yourself furniture, misaligned holes, doesn't happen. The doors even hang perfectly.

Also on the recent agenda: slowly removing the sod from the fresh planting zone in the front yard, which we are gradually converting from grass to landscaping. I throw the sod into the bamboo out back, which needs more soil. Meanwhile, the early summer has forced all the trees into leaf and the new plants, like the Pride of Madeira, into bloom -- it has spectacular purple flower spikes.

Leg day at the gym. I couldn't push my record leg press because as I walked up to the machine I use, the Asian guy who likes to do bouncing calf presses on it and read the newspaper for an hour arrived. I always give ground if there's any question of who got there first, but I muttered curses walking away -- how unattractive of me. So it was off to one of the four other machines, none of which are comparable.

Dinner. We went to Kabul Afghan Restaurant with Mike's son Dan and his fiancee Kim to discuss the wedding plans and the gift we're giving them, tickets to wherever their honeymoon cruise originates. I guess Dan is technically my stepson, and I couldn't be prouder of him -- he's sweet, likes The Simpsons, and is doing really well as a web designer at Sun. Kim is a chattery but firm woman of Vietnamese extraction who's rejected traditional parental control for a completely Americanized life. They're terribly cute together.

At one point, Dan asked me if I would come to the wedding if they invited me. I said sure, I'd be honored. It's really Mike who has the negative history with Dan's mother's (his ex-wife's) family, and we all expect some of them to be less than cool, but tough -- the kids want everyone to behave, and they will.

Besides, the food they're planning sounds great!

Date: 2004-03-21 11:20 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] excessor.livejournal.com
The problem of understanding hideous instructions is exactly the reason I became a technical writer. I wanted to be paid to develop incomprehensible instructions for gullible buyers. [ducks]

I haven't bought anything big at IKEA, although I've looked for large nordic men. I thought they (IKEA, not the nordic men) were supposed to understand things like self-assembly. Too bad. At least it's well made, so you can indeed piece it all together yourself, if you'll pardon the pun.

I don't think I've ever heard you swear. The newspaper-reading guy at the gym must have relatives here in Fremont, because they show up at my gym, too: 8 reps at a fly machine, 20 minutes of reading, 3 more reps and whew! exhaustion sets in. Luckily they bring their liter of water with them—you know, to stave off yet another hydration emergency.

Kabul is one of my favorite restaurants and Dan & Kim sound like a cool couple. I love hearing you and Mike talk about them because you both sound so proud of Dan. My cousin, Carl, recently married a firm woman of Vietnamese descent who observes many of her cultural traditions but is firmly Americanized as a strong woman. She'll fit right in with the other women of our family. I hope Dan & Kim are as happy together.

Ikea in Zurich

Date: 2004-03-22 11:37 pm (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
There are two Ikeas on the outskirts of Zurich. After putting my sofa together, I decided to have the rest assembled for me. The price wasn't outrageous *by Zurich standards*, and one of the workers was cute.

However, I'm saying goodbye to all my Ikeaiana--and to Zurich--because my contract isn't being renewed for a second year.

I'll miss my apartment, but I'm very much looking forward to returning to California, eating at Kabul again, and last-but-most-importantly being with my boyfriend again.

SAC

Re: Ikea in Zurich

Date: 2004-03-23 01:25 pm (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dr-scott.livejournal.com
Has it really been a year?? Wow. Sorry you weren't renewed but selfishly happy you'll be back with us. Now maybe you can join LiveJournal and write with the cool bears.

If there's anything Ikea you're really in love with, you could disassemble it and ship it back -- one of the puzzling bits of instruction on those cabinets turned out to be the pictographs for tricky bits of disassembly. Or you could just rebuy the item here...

...and being with the bf seems much more important than staying in Zurich.

Re: Ikea in Zurich

Date: 2004-03-24 05:31 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
I've enjoyed living in Zurich, but I came here for the job, hoping he could get a work permit and come here with me. Being separated by most of a planet has definitely been hard for us. IM and such is better than nothing, but I haven't found a haptic boyfriend interface. (My twisted side has to point out the active research in this area: http://www.dcs.gla.ac.uk/~sarah/brps.htm and http://www.monzy.com/ecg/)

I think anything I bought at Ikea would cost me more to ship than to buy new. OTOH I have a custom-sized Tempur-pedic mattress (bf is 6'5") that I think I can ship for about $500, which is much less than the purchase price. Expensive but really comfy (http://www.tempurpedic.com/).

Of course the scary part is looking for a new job.
--scott c

PS. big fan of Chris Isaak...4 concerts + every CD

Re: Ikea in Zurich

Date: 2004-03-24 05:40 am (UTC)
From: (Anonymous)
btw: I know the ecg page is a hoax...but I wish it weren't

Re: Ikea in Zurich

Date: 2004-03-24 11:09 am (UTC)
From: [identity profile] dr-scott.livejournal.com
I love the "Media Lab" site. It's just like the real thing, and I would expect this application to be a big driver of the technologues. :)

We have a Tempur-pedic pillow, but haven't sprung for a mattress yet (nyuk-nyuk). Something to reserve for even older age, when we'll really need it!

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