The Magic Button

[drscott]

One of the conventional types of science fiction story has the hero discover some "magic" device -- a time-traveling watch, invisibility, teleportation. Usually this leads to trouble -- rarely does the hero act cautiously in exploring the parameters of this new power.

So here's my question: suppose you came into possession of a magic button that allowed you to painlessly remove from existence any person or persons of your choice at the moment you pushed it. Would you use it? And on who?

Comments

[billeyler.livejournal.com]

That absolutely depends on if we have an "oops...I didn't really mean it" fallback button!

[cjsmith.livejournal.com]

How many times did I push it before I figured out what it did? :-)

[fuzzygruf.livejournal.com]

I'd use it so much that I'd have Carpal Tunnel.

Is there another button available to painfully remove somebody?

Why no, of course not.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Probably not. So be careful!

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

We can posit an instruction manual, though there could be considerable merriment in a story where people who cut you off in traffic or have one too many items in the express checkout have a way of blinking out....

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

I've heard you use your powers only for Good. Just like me!

[airporter.livejournal.com]

Can't imagine using it; can certainly imagine wanting to. ;-)

[excessor.livejournal.com]

How many times could I use it? And is there a Group Delete button? Just asking.

[bjarvis.livejournal.com]

My commute to work would be a lot easier. :-^

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

I'd wear that mofugger out.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

[little devil on your shoulder] Ah, come on! Nobody will know!

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Oh, so you're a Lazy god. OK< for you there's a "group delete" function. Who are you rubbing out?

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

How venal. So you'll make your life trivially easier? Isn't there something more grandiose you could do? Oh, I forget -- you're Canadian. Limited imagination. :)

[tdjohnsn.livejournal.com]

uh oh...I think you just made his list...or are we also positing that it can't be used on you? :-)

[airporter.livejournal.com]

Just me. Damn conscience!

[airporter.livejournal.com]

Careful, please. We take a while to insult, but find inventive means of obtaining vengeance.

In a totally peace-keeping manner, of course.

[tdjohnsn.livejournal.com]

Our vet is currently looking for homes for a mother cat and her kittens (actually, last time I was there both kitten's were spoken for.) They were found in a drainage ditch far, far from any habitation. The mother cat was painfully thin because she had been giving all the food she caught to the kittens. They were all friendly and well socialized meaning someone had once owned them, then thrown them away.

I would use it on people who abandon animals. Though, could we use it to send people to an especially cold spot in hell rather than just removing them from existence?

[excessor.livejournal.com]

• People who can't drive and yet insist on sharing the road with me.


• People who hurt or maliciously mislead other people for personal gain.


• People who won't lighten up.


• Bad kissers.


• Those who do not acknowledge me as their King.


• Tricks who were so bad in bed, I'd be doing everyone a favor.


• The guy who invented the plastic cover that still fucking leaks sometimes when affixed to a Starbucks coffee cup.

There are probably more. We can talk about it at dinner.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Is there anyone left? You're starting to look like Billy Mumy.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

It's a thought experiment, so feel relatively safe. Anyway, I was almost a Canadian citizen, so I'm allowed to kid around.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

"Canadian vengeance" is sort of like "military intelligence" -- it may exist, but it's somewhat short of the genuine article. Like attending a Unitarian Universalist service for the fiery preaching.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Remind me not to cross you. [soothe soothe]!

[greatbearmd.livejournal.com]

I'd much rather push your buttons. ;)

[excessor.livejournal.com]

I have no freckles, so I can't look like Billy Mumy.

Yes, there are plenty of people left. The only ones gone are bad drivers (probably not even 5% of the population), molesters, those who dupe the elderly, and religious zealots who line their pockets at the expense of overly trusting believers. Oh, and dishonest political leaders like Milosovic and his ilk.

You haven't said if you would pick anyone.

[ pause ]

I wuv you.

[dr-scott.livejournal.com]

Aww, that's awful. It's interesting how many people want to be sure there's some suffering for the target.